Diamond Paws

A SHOWING POEM

FROM THE WELSH STAFFORD MAGAZINE/STAFFWEST WINTER 1997

I'M SITTING AT THE RINGSIDE AT A CHAMPIONSHIP SHOW, SO WHO'S IN THE LINE UP? LET'S LOOK ALONG THE ROW.

THERE'S * I'VE EVERYTHING* WHO ALWAYS HEADS THE LINE, SHE'S GOT HER SMARTEST SUIT ON, AND THE DOG IS LOOKING FINE. SHE KNOWS HER *FAVE* ALL ROUNDER IS JUDGING IN THE GROUP, BUT IT WOULD TAKE A *BEST IN SHOW* WIN TO MAKE HER COOK - A - HOOP.

NOW MR * GOT IT IN THE BAG* SPORTS A CONCEITED GRIN, HE HAD ONLT TO TURN UP TO GUARANTEE THIS WIN. HE KNOWS HIS DOG'S BY FAR THE BEST, THE JUDGE HAS TOLD HIM SO, AND WHAT'S MORE HE BELEIVES IT, AND LETS EVERYBODY KNOW.

MRS * EVER HOPEFUL* IS LOOKING VERY PLEASED, IT'S HER FIRST TIME IN THE *LAST SIX* AT BIG SHOWS SUCH AS THESE. SHE'S HAD A PHOTO TAKEN TO REMIND HER OF THIS DAY, THE DOG IS LOOKING CHEERFUL TOO, *CHOOSE ME* HE SEEMS TO SAY.

MRS *MY BEST FRIEND'S THE JUDGE* THINKS SHE MUST HAVE A CHANCE, FOR SHE'S PLIED THE JUDGE WITH WHISKEY, AT THE CLUB'S LAST DINNER DANCE. AND LITTLE EVENING *SOIREES* HAVE BEEN HELD TO TEMPT HER PREY, WHERE IT'S SAID SHE'S ON OCCASIONS HAD HER *ASSETS* ON DISPLAY.

MR *I COULD DO BETTER* GIVES THE JUDGE AN ICY STARE, HE KNOWS HE'D DO A BETTER JOB, IF HE WAS STANDING THERE. APART FROM MINE HE THINKS, THIS LINES A MOTLEY CREW, WITHOUT A DOUBT THE JUDGE MUST HAVE AN EYE TEST, LONG OVERDUE.

AND MR *IT'S MY FIRST TIME* IS THERE WAVING TO A FRIEND, HE WONDERS WHY THIS EXTRA CLASS HAS BEEN STUCK IN AT THE END. BUT SOMEONE JUST TOLD HIM, IF HIS DOG WILL STAND AND SHOW, HE MAY JUST GET A *TICKET*, TO WHERE HE DOESN'T KNOW.

SO WHO EMERGED THE WINNER? WELL I'LL LEAVE THAT UP TO YOU, BUT MR *GOT IT IN THE BAG* HIS TOP NEARLY BLEW. MR * I COULD DO BETTER* HAD A FACE NOT TO BE MISSED. MRS *MY BEST FRIENDS THE JUDGE* HAS REVISED HER CHRISTMAS LIST.

YET I'M SURE THAT ALL THOSE PRESENT WOULD BE CERTAIN TO AGREE, THAT DOG SHOWING'S *JUST THE TICKET*, BUT IN WHICH SENSE DON'T ASK ME.

AUTHOR UNKNOWN

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